Can Your Relationship Survive A Long Distance Relationship?
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Connect Electronically From Far Away?
It is a hard decision to think about if you want to move away from your mate to explore other options (career or new scenery). When you have the thought in your head you would like to move away from them you don't know how they will take it, different scenarios may happen:
Scenario #1: They will say I am coming with you, I can't be a day with out you (sounds like a movie but you wish it goes this way)
Scenario #2: They will ask well how long are you moving away for? What about us? I can't be without you for more than a couple days
Scenario#3: Okay, I am not going to stop you from doing what you want. Maybe this will make our relationship stronger.
Depending on what scenario you may experience is how you will feel about doing this drastic move. Scenario # 3 happened for me. Questions that automatically popped up in my head: Why he is not putting up a fight for me? He is not worried about our relationship? Is this is this exit? Why isn't he talking me out of it? I was hoping for scenario #2 since I have been in this relationship for over 5 years, I was hoping he would make feel the need for me to be a drive away instead of a plane ride, make me feel selfish for trying to move away so far.
After you experience your scenario you then star to think about how exactly this could work:
Phone
Internet
Video phone
See each other every 3 to 6 months
I am a person that thinks things through for every challenge that arises in my life, my first thing is how long is this long distance relationship is suppose to last? How long am I suppose to wait until you (being the man) to want to complete this relationship and be as one (I am a complete romantic).
For me I need that connection, I had a preview of a long distance relationship in college and it was awful when you really wanted to see that person you couldn't and when you do see them you don't want them to leave. If they put up a fight and you still go, the effort should be in both partners court to keep the relationship in the same condition before you left, you will be utilizing every form of communication to keep your relationship in tact.
At the end of the day in my book, you want a man to fight for you instead of just letting you go without hesitation, makes you think you are not worth it and if they really love you and they want you in there life everyday physically not just through a electronic device. I think it should be a state law men should watch at least 2 romantic movies a year.
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Yes he is the love of my life, and we have been together for years. This wasn't a test, I am very open with him and discuss anything that is on my mind such as moving away.
I must admit I am still the old fashioned type of girl that expects a man to decide when he is ready to take it to the next level.
dashingscorpio Level 5 Commenter 19 months ago
There seems to be a lot of variables with your scenario.
You don't say whether or not this man is "the love of your life" or if you've discussed getting married in the near future. If you have been a couple for a few months or few years...
If you're simply dating or in a typial girlfriend/boyfriend relationship a man may feel he has no right to ask you to change your life. (for example if you're moving away for a better career option)
If the move is a "test" to see what he would do to keep you there then it's kind of imature.
Either person in a relationship that wants to take things to another level should open up the discussion to see how the other person feels about it.
There are lots of women who see themselves as being strong and independent but when it comes to asking a man for what they truly want they tend to become passive and revert back to an era where women were forced to wait until the man suggested they take things to a new level.
A woman has every right to make sure there is no gray in the relationship. She can be proactive and ask.
Honest communication beats romantic notions every time.